1. The Femme's always makes THE RULES.
  2. THE RULES are subject to change without notice.
  3. No Butch can possibly know all of THE RULES.
  4. If the Femme suspects that the Butch knows all of THE RULES, she must immediately change some of THE RULES.
  5. The Femme is never wrong.
  6. If it appears that the Femme is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding caused by something that the Butch did or said wrong.
  7. If Rule #6 applies, the Butch must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.
  8. The Femme can change her mind at any time.
  9. The Butch must never change her mind without the express, written consent of The Femme.
  10. The Femme has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
  11. The Butch must remain calm at all times, unless the Femme wants her Butch to be angry or upset.
  12. The Femme must, under no circumstances, let the Butch know whether she wants her to be angry or upset.
  13. The Butch is expected to read the mind of the Femme at all times.
  14. At all times, what is important is what the Femme meant, not what she said.
  15. If the Butch doesn't abide by THE RULES, it is because she can't take the heat, lacks backbone, and is a wimp.
  16. If the Femme has PMS, all of THE RULES are null and void and the Butch must cater to her every whim.
  17. Any attempt to document THE RULES could result in bodily harm.
  18. If the Butch, at any time, believes that she is right, she must refer to Rule #5.

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