Shelly Robert's RULES for the correct Lesbian

A lesbian drinks out of a glass. A dyke pops a top.
A lesbian buys real estate. A dyke rents.
A lesbian keeps stock in the safety deposit box. A dyke puts it back out on the shelf.
A dyke on bike owns a Harley. A lesbian owns a Schwinn.
A dyke's tattos dont rub off. A lesbian's don't show.
A lesbian brunches. A dyke drives-through.
A lesbian has acquaintances. A dyke has buddies.
A dyke buys Playboy over the counter. A lesbian has a subscription.
None of a lesbian's earrings are made from parts in her tool box.
A lesbian drives a Porsche. A dyke commands a Camaro.
A lesbian has her ears pierced. A dyke always goes further.  Way further.
A dyke can actually say the word dildo.
A lesbian can pass.
You can always tell a dyke. But not much.
A lesbian cooks. A dyke defrosts.
A dyke makes dinner. A lesbian makes reservations.
A lesbian entertains at home. A dyke has a regular stool.
A lesbian networks. And chats. A dyke shows up.
A lesbian serves canapes. A dyke feeds you from a can o'peas.
A dyke has a tool belt. A lesbian has a tooled belt.
A dyke will drink from the hose. A lesbian sprays Evian to set her makeup.
A dyke believes she looks good in an eight dollar haircut.
A lesbian plays games. A dyke watches them.
A dyke plays softball. A lesbian plays hardball.
Or was it the other way around....?

                    .......Shelly Roberts