One Liners

Old lesbian answer to the ignorant straight person's question "What do you do in bed exactly?"
Answer: "The same things you do, except better and for a longer period of time."

This is a visual joke, so imagine:
Stick out your tongue straight in front of you. Ask: "what's this?"
Answer: "A lesbian with a hard on"

Why can't lesbians go on a diet and wear makeup at the same time?
You can't eat Jenny Craig with Mary Kay on your face.

Female comedian is being harrassed on stage by a man in the audience.
He yells, "What are you, a dyke?"
She responds with, "What are you, my alternative?"

What do you call a lesbian with long fingernails?

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